Remember back when you were just a wee little lad; when you had no responsibilities and the three things on your todo list for the day were: find worms, eat worms, and play with Steve from across the street?...(read more)
Look at the picture above you. Look at that beautiful glistening bacon grease. Look at that chewy rubbery bacon fat. Look at that crispity crisp bacon edge. If this doesn’t make your mouth water, then you might as well become a...(read more)
Every passing day brings us closer and closer to the 2012 Apocalypse as predicted by the Mayan who carved ‘December 21st, 2012’ and then quit his job because he was sick of it and wanted to be a DJ....(read more)
I uh spilled coffee on my pants and have to walk around all day with a stain.
Let's not lie. You crapped your pants and half the day has gone by with people giving you dirty looks. Your underwear has crusted over and the grease from the bacon in your pockets has been dripping down your leg and into your shoe the entire day. It's time to clean up for god's sake. Good thing you have Emergency Underpants.